Apr 18
I think our desire for instant success (understandable as it is) can make it harder to access the powerful benefits of self-kindness meditation. I wanted self-kindness to make difficult feelings like anxiety and shame go away. And fast. But it's interesting that the things that have helped me the most have taken longer to take effect than other things that have helped to a lesser degree.
Mindfulness doesn't remove discomfort so that we're 'fixed' and never feel it again. In this human life, we're going to keep on experiencing the unpleasant, the difficult and the challenging - alongside what's beautiful, moving and enjoyable.
At what age do we stop learning and growing? The reality is, we're all learning, all the time. And rather than this being something to be ashamed of, it's something to celebrate.
It appears I have a new superpower - being able to get my needs met. How? By asking. That sounds ridiculously simple, but for me it's been a long and complex journey.
For an awfully long time, I believed that I could only be happy when I'd changed something about myself. Then, several years back I went through a bereavement which changed all the relationships in my life, not least the one I have with myself. Here's what I learned that helped me finally let go of self-attacking.
